Tuesday, January 8, 2008

Bright Stars and Bright Teeth

Well folks, the last 3 months have been a bit topsey-turvey to say the least. Thanksgiving travel, the passing of my grandmother, more travel, the ending of my job/job hunting, Christmas travel, sore hands, etc., has made blogging a bit sporadic to say the least. But with some time on my hands, at least for right now, and my hands healing a bit, I'm going to get back in the swing of things. Hopefully I can win my readership back.
Anyway, so I go to the dentist yesterday for a little annual cleaning. The guy tries to tell me I need to replace EVERY filling in my mouth with porcelain or something. Apparently, the mercury is slowly poisoning me. I just didn't know it. I say, "I've had these since about 1982, so I think I'm poisoned by now." Then, his asst. tries to sell me on his credentials by telling me about his French upbringing. As if I'm now supposed to say, "Oh, well that changes EVERYTHING. Replace every tooth in my mouth if you'd like. He's French, so it must be true."
I said, "My last dentist never said a word about this. Why not?" "Because 'ee iz, eh, how you say, 'stoo-peed. Zat ees vai." (I'm adding the Inspector Clouseau accent. He didn't have one. But he DID say 'stupid,' as in, 'stupid American'). I told ol' Marcel Marceau that I'd sleep on it and get back to him.
What was interesting to me was outside the office. His office is up on Hollywood Blvd. Apparently it's on the wrong side of the tracks of Hollywood Blvd., at least as far as the walk of fame goes. I mean no disrespect to the folks I'm going to mention, but while there were a few A-Listers, the 7000 block is populated predominantly by the C-Listers. 'Lessen of course, you consider Terry Bradshaw, Isabel Sanford, Mac Davis, The Osmonds and Don Cornelius as A-List. Plus, the physical location of the block leaves something to be desired. It's like on a dangerous corner at an awkward intersection. It's not near any tourist haunts. Really, it's just near, well, pompous French dentists. Like, the only one who'd know about where Weezie's star is located would be Sherman Hemsley.
Anyway, this is the kind of mundane minutiae you can now look forward to on the regular again folks. Happy New Year.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Welcome back, Scott. Please be advised that your dentist is misinforming you about all your fillings needing to come out, at least not because of mercury poisoning. That mercury poisoning stuff was debunked a long time ago. Just an excuse to make money.

Darren Felzenberg said...

My parents took me to see Marcel Marceau in NYC during his 1977 (?) tour. When I visited LA during the summer, I was absolutely floored by one star on the walk of fame: Isabel Sanford. I was like, "Where's the star for Marla Gibbs? It was Florence's wisecracks that carried the show." My advice regarding the fillings it to replace the mercury with placebo.

Elise A. Miller said...

i agree with your father. keep those teeth! that was funny stuff. glad to have you back in the blogiverse.